The Secret to a Happy Marriage

                                                                 

We have reached a milestone, 40 years of living happily ever after!

What is a happy marriage?

What keeps a marriage together?

What tears a marriage apart?

I don't have the answer to any of those questions! As I see the marriages that fall apart in Christian circles, it scares me! Do we even have what it takes to keep our marriage together?

As I look back to the day we got married, we were two kids that had no idea what we were doing! We didn't know where we wanted to be in 10 years! We definitely didn't know how we were going to get there.

We didn't start married life with a hefty bank account, two vehicles and a new house. It took everything we had to buy several appliances. Thankfully our mobile home came with the job. We were ready to face the world together but we didn't have a clue what it was going to cost.

As the hurdles started flying at us, we would blunder our way over them. Sometimes we would try to take different routes, then it would take a while to find our way back to each other. Some of the hurdles turned into mountains that we thought we would face every day the rest of our lives. We didn't have Dr Dobson, Gary Smalley, or Dennis Rainey to see if this was normal wedded bliss! We didn't give up, on our marriage or each other!

Phillipians 3:13 ...."forgetting those things which are behind, and reaching forth unto those things which are before", I'm taking this out of context here but it works!! This works in our Christian life as well as our marriage! We forgave and forgot all the past hurts.  Trying to carry all that stuff through the years just bogged us down. Forget what happened yesterday and start each day with a clean slate!

We are two different personalities. We don't always like the same things. I like an omelet with as many veggies as you can stash into it, he likes a meat and cheese omelet and that's it!! I say its boring, he says its good!
When we go on vacation, he likes to head for the hills or mountains away from people and as close to nature as he can get.
 I'm not a shopper, but I do love to stroll through the gift shops, looking at everything, buying nothing. We do both, he endures the gift shops, while I follow him through the mountains.

I think God put me in Rob's life to balance his orderliness. he has a place for everything and everything is in its place! When he does misplace something, I want to jump up and down! It happens so seldom.
I on the other hand, have spent most of my life looking for stuff! When I use something, that's where I leave it! I can stand at my desk, write out a grocery list, pick up the list, and walk out of the room. Ten minutes later I'm ready to head for the store but I can't find the list anywhere! It has completely vanished!

Then there are the times when our personalities take different directions....
He has had a full week of tilling and sowing and wants to spend Sunday afternoon at home. I start to feel like a caged lion after 6 days of just doing my normal chores. I remember how many times he has said, "I know of a place you would really like to see...."
So we're sitting there reading but I want to do something...anything! Even a walk...(I hate to walk!!!) So I say, "Lets do something" and he says, "What do you want to do" Now I know where this is going, so I say, "Nothing, just forget it" Then he says, "I hate when you do that, just tell me what you want to do and we'll do it" And I'm thinking "You are the one who had all these ideas of things you wanted to show me and now you can't think of a single one of them???" So we sit there in silence for several minutes, till finally he says, 'You wanna go for a drive ?"  "Yes, Yes, Absolutely, that's exactly what I want to do!!". I am so happy, he suggested a drive!...even if I did goad him into it!!

We spent a Saturday morning digging potatoes. Till we were finished the sun was hot and we were feeling a little over heated. We took a lunch break then Rob wanted to take an electric fence down around our dried up river bed. He planned to move the fence across a new alfalfa field that he had started but he didn't want the cows to graze it. The field wasn't that wide so he decided to drag the fence to its new location instead of rolling it up and unrolling it again. It sounded like a good plan to me, except that it kept getting hung up on sunflower roots. Till we got the fence down and moved to the new fence line we were both exhausted. We were two hours beyond the time he told me it would take. I didn't have any snacks and our water was running low. Rob was overheated from pounding all those T-posts. I hadn't eaten lunch  so I was suffering from acute...I don't know what... but I was sick! He had been putting up the fence as he pounded in the T-posts so we were making progress.  We just had to put more plastic posts in to stabilize it and unravel the knot, that had materialized at the end of our fence as we were dragging it. We finally got the knot out! Rob tried to push a plastic post into the ground but it wouldn't penetrate. The ground was harder than concrete! I could have cried, I was so tired and hungry, we were only about 15 minutes from being finished. Rob said, "I'll take you back to the house so you can rest, get my drill and come out and work till midnight till I get these posts in." I don't know why, but all of a sudden I saw red!!  I don't think it had anything to do with my upset stomach. "You can rest" and "I'll work till midnight" did it!  Thankfully I was too sick to respond! I knew he was discouraged but I felt wounded by that remark. I said, "Can we please eat supper before you come back out?"  It was almost 11 hours since breakfast and I was fading fast! I was right, it was food we needed! We were both in better humor after we got food! I went back out with him and drove the side-by-side while he finished putting posts in the ground. He didn't need to drill too many postholes, if he found a crack in the ground the post went right in. We were a happy couple heading back to the house, and it was a pretty long time before midnight too, I might add!!

So you see, we still don't have any idea what we are doing, but God took our imperfections and made us perfect for each other. We still blunder our way over the hurdles, we just try to jump them together now!

We were visiting with some close friends who were married over 60 years. They were having a good natured argument about something that happened a long time ago. We said, "Hey, you guys are being a bad example for us young ones!!" They both stopped and looked at us, "We aren't arguing," they said, laughing, "we're just having a moment of intense fellowship!!" Half the fun of "intense fellowship" is laughing at the silliness of it afterward!


Being deeply loved by someone gives you strength,
While loving someone deeply gives you courage.  (Laozi)


The secret to a happy marriage remains a secret! (Henry Youngman)

A Summer with Landon!

We had a very interesting visitor at our ranch this summer. Six year olds are the most fascinating little people! They have no idea what their next adventure will be but they face it head on. They quietly listen to grown up conversations and form their own opinions, or fears... as this little boy happened to do. He came to our ranch with the opinion that we see wolves and coyotes on a regular basis. He is terrified of wolves and coyotes, but he came with his family with the healthy fear that if he saw one he could outrun it!

                                            Landon would rather lead Sugar than ride her!

He wasn't here a week when he was riding his bike up the road past our windmill, a distance of about  3 tenths of a mile from our house.  A little later he was out in the driveway with his Dad and saw a car go up the road, "Oh, No, there goes my bike!" His dad asked, "Where's your bike?" "Well, you see, I was riding my bike up the road, when I got to the windmill I thought I heard a wolf so I jumped off my bike and ran back here!" He even took the time to take off his helmet and lay it on his bike! He walked up the road to get his bike, it was still there, all in one piece!

About a month later he was talking to his cousin on the phone. Damian asked him how he liked living in the west. Landon replied, "Well, I'll tell ya', I haven't seen or heard a coyote and I haven't seen or heard a wolf so I think I'm gonna be okay!"

Our son in law Nate, told Landon if he pushed an empty water bottle against both of his bike tires, he can turn his bike into a motor bike. Nate proceeded to put water bottles against his tires. Landon would race around the house on his motor bike. It really sounded like a swarm of angry bees were after him. He wore out two water bottles and put two more in their place. Then his motor bike started throwing him. Every day he would come in with a new scratch or bump. He finally took the bottles off the tires thinking that was the problem but his bike continued to throw him off. He came in the house one day all upset. He declared that whoever made his bike, made it a jerk!!!

The young people would spend their evenings playing card games. Black Seven became a favorite. Landon was too young to play but he would walk around the table and tell everybody who had the rook or any other card that was holding up the game. He watched and listened so well that one day a bunch of us were out in the barnyard working with the horses, he came out of the house with a hand full of cards. "Anybody want to play black seven?" he asked. Somebody asked him, "What did you do, stack your hand?" "Noooo", he said slowly, "I just got the rook, all the black, and all the sevens!" He didn't know how to play but he had all the winning cards!
                                                            
                                                                    

We started playing with him. He always wanted to sit beside Jaci, he thought she was a pretty cool girl. Sadly the feeling wasn't mutual, but she humored him. When he was dealt his hand, he would look at it and moan, "Oh No I got the worst card, the rook!" He never knew where to play it so when Jaci couldn't go and needed a card. Landon would give her the rook. Jaci would say "No Landon give me your worst card" "No Jaci, I always give you my best card" He did too, none of the rest of us got treated like Jaci did.

                                        He had no idea Karen was getting ready to wallop him
                                        on the head. He had just announced that he had the "worst card ever"!

                                        

                    Jaci and Karen were getting ready to fly back to PA, Landon was Jaci's shadow!

He heard somebody say if you set real still a hummingbird will land on your finger. He sat real still for about 30 seconds then proclaimed that it doesn't work and he's never doing it again!!

The boys found fish in a culvert under the road below our place. The water was slowly drying up so they were on a "Save the Fish" campaign. They transported them back to our stock ponds. I lost count at how many they transplanted, somewhere around 200, I think. Landon was pretty proud of the fish he caught with his net.

Adventures With the Meyers Family Part 3

Horseback Riding.                                            July 18, 2018                                       

One thing everyone wants to do when they come to Grandma and Grandpa's is ride a horse. This gang was no exception. It was the 5th week of their stay and we still hadn't found a horse to ride. We had friends about an hour south of us that had a horse they would loan us for the duration of Deb and the children's stay but SOMEBODY had to go pick it up. NOBODY would go after it, so we were stuck!

I finally called on our neighbors, Jimmy and Lisa. They have two horses but they are working horses not kid friendly horses. It turned out that Lisa's was kid friendly and they invited the whole tribe over to their place to ride. The girls were ecstatic, finally it was happening.

                                            Jimmy getting Cramer ready for the children.

 

Jimmy giving Jude instructions on how to start, turn, and stop Cramer

 

 

I don't think Jude was expecting to ride the horse entirely by himself.

 

 

Lance taking his turn.

 

 

Karen

 

 

For the first time of riding, Carter did really well.

 

 

Tesla was a little wary of her first time.

 

 

Cramer followed Jimmy around the corral while Tesla held on for dear life.

after each ride she got a little more comfortable, till the end of the evening "Cramer was the bestest horse ever!!" and she was sitting tall in the saddle.

 

 

Jamie

 

 

Jaci

 

 

This is what Deb really came to Idaho for!!

Now if she could just convince her Dad that horses really are an asset!!

 

 

Jimmy became Tesla's greatest fan.

She latched on to every bit of cowboy wisdom he had to offer.

 

 

Jimmy drew quite an audience.

 

 

After the boys had two rides each they started to get buggy so we

 decided to walk home and let the girls keep riding.

When we passed a pond they began looking for stones to see which one could throw from the road and get the stones into the pond.

 

 

The competition got quite intense. 

It soon became evident they were going to need to get closer if they wanted to hit the water.

Any closer and they would have been in the pond!

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

The Elk That Almost Got Away

It was Friday evening, November 2, 2018, next to the last day of elk season. Jesse and Dorinda had been here for two weeks and were planning to leave the next day and head back to PA. Nate still hadn't gotten his elk and Jesse really wanted to see him get one before he left. The guys knew there were elk in the cornfield they had been hunting in, they just couldn't figure out a way to get them to run out.

Jesse and Andy devised a plan around the supper table that evening. If they got the children out of bed early the next morning, they could go with the guys, walk through the cornfield and chase the elk out. I couldn't believe the children fell for that! They were beyond excited to go hunting.

At breakfast the next morning 8 children showed up raring to go.  Jaci, Blake, Karen, Cheyenne, Zane, Cody, Denver, and Dallas.

Now this is the story that I heard, since I wasn't at the scene of action till it was all over!

The guys took the kids to the head of the field and told them to spread out in a line and start walking. Jesse and Nate got into position, Andy had already got his elk so Im not sure what his part in all this was. When the children came out at the other end, no elk came out ahead of them.

Karen said she saw an elk but it ran behind her. According to Jaci, "It was all because of Karen we had to walk through again." This time the guys told them to talk and yell! Well, that part should have been easy!!

That time they chased one lonely elk out and Nate shot it, but it ran...yup....back into the cornfield. So the kids were supposed to walk through again, this time yapping like dogs!  They chased it out again and Nate shot it again but it ran.... back into the corn. That time they were pretty sure it was a fatal shot so the guys took the children to McDonalds and got them lunch before they all had to walk through the corn one more time to locate the elk.

While they were at McDonalds, Jesse called Dorinda and told her to get everything packed up and pick him and the children up, they were heading back to PA after they helped Nate find the elk.

Rob was tilling ground about half way between our house and the fields the guys were at. Rob met Dorinda and I at the café and we followed him to the field. When we got there the crew had just found the elk and were getting a uniloader to pull it out of the field!

It was a huge field with irrigation ditches so wide I thought we were going to bury our Ranger pickup! Rob finally turned around and drove back the way we had come in, on the way out we found part of our truck's  bumper! Our little truck will never be the same! I don't know how those little boys walked that field 3 times!

                                         Andy got the elk and carried it out to an open field.

                                                And then the trophy picture. Good Job!!!

                                                          Nate and his elk.

 

Then it was time for half this crew to head back to PA!

I was pretty sure after the morning they had they would sleep halfway across the states.

 

Our Rainbow in the Midst of Storms

It was a depressing week. We were only two weeks into the calving season, and the 10 day forecast showed snow, rain, and wind everyday nonstop. Not the best weather for new calves.

We made it through the worst of the ten days...we thought. We were checking cows every two - three hours. Our days and nights were running together with little sleep in between.

Finally the forecast showed a morning of rain or snow showers and in the afternoon the sun was going to shine.

We were looking forward to the sun like it was Christmas!

We should have been forewarned. The day before this lovely sunshine was going to grace us, 8 of our cows had calves. We never had 8 in a 24 hour period!

The next morning the snow showers turned into a snow storm and dumped 3 inches of very wet heavy snow on all our babies. The sun never found its way through the clouds! The calves had no place dry to lay.

A day and a half later we found the first calf struggling to breathe. We took it into the barn put it in the warming box and doctored it up. A couple hours later it died.

We found the second calf that afternoon, it seemed to still be alert but it was definitely having breathing difficulties.We loaded her onto the side-by- side and headed for the barn, the mother cow bellering accusations behind us. We quickly got the calf into the warming box, got medicine and warm liquids into her. We kept her in the barn all night, working with her every time we went out to check for new calves. By morning she seemed to be doing better but her breathing was still ragged and rough sounding.

We were hoping the sun would come out by the time we were done feeding. The calf needed some sun as bad as she needed her mother. We loaded her onto the side by side and took her back up on the hill. We soon found her mother and unloaded the calf. Then we drive a short distance away to watch them bond together.

It was cold, and muddy. Rob and I were still a little depressed by the happenings of the past 24 hours. The cow and calf seemed to be doing well, we wanted to be sure she was nursing before we headed back to the house.

Our of the corner of my eye I saw two calves start running across the pasture. They looked like they were racing, as they passed another calf who was nursing, he stopped to look, and then started running after them, Along the way they picked up two more calves.

Then I heard some commotion from the direction they had just come from. Two mothers were trotting toward this group of calves, who were by now running wide open toward the end of the field. Their tails straight up.

The mothers were definitely agitated, they were also picking up speed and mooing threatening adjectives.  As they passed the cow whose calf had been nursing, she decided she needed to join in the chase toward the renegade calves.

As I was sitting there chuckling at this scene, Rob also lost interest in the sick calf and her mother. By now the calves were almost at the end of the pasture still running full tilt.  They made a wide U turn never losing speed and headed right back the way they had come, full speed ahead!

The mothers were still running toward the calves, mooing threateningly with udders swinging, as the calves passed them heading in the opposite direction. The mothers stopped and turned to watch the wayward calves. You could almost see them shrug their shoulders and say, " What's the use?

The calves soon lost interest in whatever they were running from and wandered back to their mothers.

Rob and I continued to laugh over this scenario. It was just what we needed. It helped to blow away the dark cloud that seemed to hang over us. God was telling us no matter how depressing the weather his creatures could still enjoy it and we could too if we just took time to look for the rainbow!

"After every storm there is a rainbow, no matter how long it takes to show up."

All in a Day's Work

We get a lot of visitors. Some are on vacation and want to spend a few days with us. Others want to come get a taste of ranch life, and help with whatever we are doing at the time.

One attraction is moving cows, or gathering cows off the government land. We have the allotment with 3 other ranchers. We don't know the exact amount of acres the cows run on but we're supposing its over 10,000 acres, It is divided up into 3 sections, about every six weeks we move the cows to a different section.  Its usually a group effort, we take our 2 4wheelers, and the other ranchers take their horses, in a couple hours the cows are grazing on a different section.

September 25 is the day each rancher is supposed to have his cattle off the BLM. It can take up to a week to find all our cows and calves depending on which pasture they are in.

September 25, 2018,  Rob's cousin Kathy and her twins, Colton and Cameron were helping us gather the cows. We also had a friend visiting, who came out to archery hunt for elk but he was getting discouraged and offered to drive one of the rigs to haul the cows back to our pasture.

Our neighbors Jimmy and Lisa took their horses and dogs, and starting looking for the cows.

As Jimmy and Lisa found cows they would trail them to the temporary corral the guys had set up. Then Rob and Rusty would load them on the trailers and haul them to their fall grazing pasture.

Rob, Rusty, and Colton had left with their second loads.

 Jimmy and Lisa were not finding the last of the cows so Kathy and Cameron took our 4wheelers and were going to ride over another area of the rangeland. They were only gone about 20 minutes when Cameron and Kathy came back riding double. Kathy's 4wheeler let her sit in the sage, out in the middle of nowhere.

As we stood there discussing what we should do, Cameron's cell phone rang. It was Colton telling him to bring a 4wheeler, the door on one of the trailers flew open in route, the whole load (about 13 cows and calves) had emptied onto the road. Rusty said later, he looked in his mirror and saw cows and calves spinning on the road and he thought" Oh no! it just can't be! He had offered his help and look what happened!

 Some of the cows were skinned up a bit but not injured bad enough to slow them down!

Cameron took off on the 4wheeler. Rob called Jimmy and Lisa, so they loaded up their horses and we all drove to the spot the cows escaped. By the time we all got there, the cows and calves had formed two groups and were heading in different directions. Jimmy and Lisa got their horses and rounded up each group and trailed them to the neighbors corral. By the time they got them all rounded up, the horses and dogs were exhausted, the cows were confused and the adults were discouraged!

We had moved 37 pair off the BLM and were still missing about 15 pair.

We decided to call it a day.

The guys did go back and pick up the disabled 4wheeler

That evening Kathy convinced Rob he had to have a horse. They spent every evening looking through websites. Within the week we not only had one, but three horses.... now we just need to learn how to ride them... and teach them to herd cows!!

                                                                          Kuna

 

Ginger

 

Sugar

P.S.
Over the course of the next several weeks we did find the rest of the cows and calves. They had moved to neighboring ranches looking for greener grass!

Snow Storms, Baby Calves, and Loco Cows

It's calving season again! I have decided it is my most dreaded time of year. It seems like winter doesn't really begin until calves are ready to make their appearance!

This years calving started out with the threat of two winter storms, back to back. The first storm was to last 3 days and dump 10-12 inches of snow on us. The second storm was to last 1 1/2 days and dump 8 more inches.

The first storm hit and we got 8 inches of snow, the third day the snow continued to fall and the wind started blowing. It turned freezing temperatures into an arctic blast!

We hadn't had any calves born yet and we were praying they would wait till both storms were over! Rob was going out late in the evening and early in the morning to check the cows.

The third morning he went out and found a new momma, the calf was pretty well frozen, she couldn't open her mouth so Rob brought her in and put her in the warming box. He decided to go out again and look for more calves, he saw some cows at the bottom of a draw so he walked down to see if any of them had calves. He found a calf  that was in pretty bad shape so he brought him in and put him in the warming box too. As he looked at the calf he thought it looked awful small so he went back out and looked around again. He found the other twin but he had already died.

We got warm milk into both calves that were in the box, but the other little twin died within the hour.

Several hours later when the first calf was up and running around we took her out to her mother. Her mother came up to her and smelled her but she just wouldn't mother up to her. We sat a distance away and Rob watched her through binoculars, the cow would kick the calf when she tried to suck or she would buck her away when the calf nuzzled her head. It was so frustrating.

We decided to let them together for a couple hours and see if the mother would accept the calf. Several hours later Rob went up to check them, he took the calf carrier along. If the mother was still rejecting the calf he would load the calf on the carrier and hope the mother followed. He planned to bring them both back to the barn. We learned by experience if you put cow and calf is a small area the cows mothering instinct will kick in. 

The cow was still rejecting the calf so Rob loaded the calf onto the carrier and started to drive away. The cow refused to follow. As he was driving down off the butte, he saw the cow that lost her twins that morning, in the draw where she had given birth. He started bawling like a calf, when she saw the calf on the carrier she thought it was hers and started coming toward the them. It was a slow process but Rob eventually got her into the corral. She realized the calf wasn't hers but she didn't kick it away either.

Sometimes you need to skin the dead calf and wrap the coat around the orphan calf so the mother recognizes the scent. Rob was hoping he wouldn't need to do that. He made a small pen in the barn and moved cow and calf into the barn. Later that evening he saw the calf nursing. We let out a big sigh of relief! We kept the cow and calf in the barn for several days. The morning the second storm was supposed to be over Rob let cow and calf out of the barn. It was a happy momma leading her new baby back to the herd!!